The REAL meaning of #COVFEFE

In another of Trumps late nite tweets he has exposed himself once again. The tweet reads:

“Despite constant negative press covfefe”

At first glance this seems like he meant to continue to bemoan the negative press that just won’t go away. You would think that perhaps if he did good things, he’d get good press. This concept seems to elude him. Anyhow! There is a reason behind this tweet, it’s not obvious but Sean Spicer was absolutely right when he said a small group of people know exactly what the president actually meant.
The president has become obsessed with Nespresso’s YouTube and television ads featuring George Clooney. He’s jealous of Clooney’s popularity and has been overheard talking to himself saying things like “everyone loves this guy. Why do they love this guy”? So it seems the POTUS is doing the math. Clooney was on TV and so was he, so that’s a wash. George has been the spokesperson for Nespresso for a while now, but Trump has endorsed many failed products, ties, steaks, ummm, “education”, but never COFFEE! Trump has decided that coffee must be the key to Clooney’s success.

So the president, desperate for love and desperately needing a victory will soon launch his own coffee company not only to offer a new coffee product but a new way to make coffee. The new “negative press” design will make coffee that is stronger in an effort to get people addicted to the caffeine. However all attempts to perfect the negative press design have ended in failure, producing weak, watery flavoured coffee that you can’t even pay people to drink. So what does covfefe mean? It’s the name of his product. Clooney is a spokesperson for Nespresso so Trumps first move was to try and use the name NesCafe which is already in use. So after being told that he can’t launch a company while he’s president they started referring to it as “Covert Coffee” which was then shortened to “Covfefe”.
Trump is desperate to get the ball rolling on this new venture and needed a way to reassure investors so he issued the seemingly nonsensical tweet.


The Donald, knowing that twitter limits you to just 140 characters left some words out. What he really meant to say is at follows.

“Despite problems with the negative press design Covfefe will be America’s #1 coffee, believe me.”



blog comments powered by Disqus